You Might Have Too Much Stuff If…

This week, it is time for some humor.  In the tradition of Jeff Foxworthy, I asked my friends to finish this sentence: “You might have too much stuff if…” 

We just have so much stuff! When do you stop bringing things home? 

My friends’ answers are funny and, somewhat telling.  So, let’s hear what they had to say, then feel free to send me your answers. 

You might have too much stuff if… 

… You have two storage units. 

… The clothes rack in one of your six closets keeps breaking. 

… You are asked to be on the TV show “Hoarders”. 

… There are 40 times more plates in your house than the number of people who live there. 

… You find three identical shirts in the three different sizes. 

… You can put a cover on each of your Cool-whip containers and stack them, and you can reach the ceiling. 

… You buy another one of something because you don’t know where the one you have is. 

… And you have more covers than bowls. More pans than covers. More coffee cups than you can use in a month. 

… An estate sale company comes to your house and instead of signing the contract, they report you to the fire department. (This humor came from one of my estate sale companies.) 

… You have to move something out of the way every time you need to a) Use the bathroom; b) Answer the phone; c) Get out the front door. 

… Something has to go out before anything else can come in. 

… You still have size 4 clothes stuck in the back of your closet. 

… You are need a shed to make room in your garage.   

… Every single surface of your house is covered. 

… You find something you do not remember buying. 

… Your mother keeps bringing stuff to your house because hers is too cluttered. (That is from my daughter!) 

… You have to buy more clothes hangers.  

… You need shelving in your basement to organize everything, so you know where things are. 

… You buy something newer to replace something new. 

… You spend more time taking care of your stuff than you do your family. 

… You have to cautiously open closet doors to not have items fall out on you, or conversely, use extra effort to close them because of them being overstuffed. 

… You cannot find electrical outlets in a room. 

… You haven’t touched something in over 30 years. 

…. No matter how many bookshelves you buy, there are still books on the floor in every room. 

… You have two garages and still cannot park the car inside. 

You have too much stuff if you are wondering if you have too much stuff! 

by Jean Long Manteufel

Jean Long Manteufel, senior move manager and CEO of Long’s Senior Transitions in Appleton, writes a column on the first Sunday of each month about life changes associated with aging. She can be reached at 920-734-3260 or 



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